"Nice" Guys with Liza Treyger

**please note: the timecode was not working on the software I use, I will update it as it gets fixed!!**

Why couldn't he set up his own Gmail account? I, that's such an, in incredible detail. Yeah. You needed your brother to set up your Gmail. I mean, I guess it was her. But it was the girl she worked with the whole time. It's just really easy. Right? It's very easy.

Okay. I haven't done it in a while. Yeah. But I don't remember it causing many problems. No. There's a lot of them. Unlimited Gmail accounts. Yeah. I don't know why she kept being so into meeting this stranger. Right. I guess if it all worked out and it was real, it would've been really romantic. And I think that that's the like, like he kept setting me up and then Yeah.

He kept trying and we kept missing each other and then we finally had our meat. Cute. Yeah. It's like a hopeless, romantic thing, but I really don't understand giving someone that many chances when you don't even know them or anything. It's, yeah, because he is gluten free. Like that's what, that's the only thing also, by the way, that was the red flag.

The finance and the gluten-free. I'm sorry. That man doesn't exist. Yeah. I mean cuz if someone has celiac, I get it. So I thought, but like, yeah. I don't know many people that are gluten-free that are like just straight dudes. Yeah. I think it's like a fake diet thing. What? Yeah, kind of a little bit on the journey to an eating disorder.

I mean, I have autoimmune, I have an autoimmune disease. Yeah. So like, they recommend going gluten-free, but a lot of it is like, it's not about the gluten actually, it's about the chemicals in Monsanto. Really? Yeah. Yeah, for sure. But doesn't Monsanto make, um, I don't even know how that's how you say it. Like vegetables and stuff.

Corn and, uh, yeah. It's like the pesticides that are being used like on the wheat that gets made into the gluten, they're so evil. They like copyrights, uh, like their plants. And if the plants go to someone else's saunas fun, they sue them. I know. Didn't sue them. Yeah. It's the, it's the worst. So it's like, I don't know.

But even still, Uh, the whole thing is just insane. I've been catfished no, twice. Once a dude showed up and he just did not look like his photos, like he and I got stuck on the date. It was like such a rookie move. It was like coming outta covid. Yeah. And so I ended up on like a three hour long date with this dude, and I was mortified to be seen with him, which is just, you know, whatever, shitty on my part.

And then the second time is like, I definitely got catfish by a guy pretending to be nice and he wasn't. But that, that's, I think nice guys are the ultimate catfish. Well, but I don't, is that a catfish? Mm-hmm. But that's like everyone lies when they first, when they're dating, it's like the best version of themselves.

It's like, it's like the boy who cried, woke. Like, I feel like that's a type of catfish that's the hill I'm gonna die on. Like, I think nice guys, you know, like I'm a nice guy, like ultimate catfish. That doesn't exist. Yeah. That's why I think jury duty really took the nation by storm. I don't know if you watched it.

Yeah. But like Ronald truly, uh, became this hero. Yeah. Okay. Which was really exciting. I mean, we still have time for fame in Hollywood to destroy him and he might cheat on his girlfriend and who knows, but. Would be. So that's why I think we loved it. He didn't say he was a nice guy. There was no, he just was, he just truly was.

Yes. And it wasn't just to people he wanted to fuck. That's the whole thing with Right. That's the whole whole thing with the nice guys. You're only nice to people. You wanna fuck, you're not very nice. And that's sort of, that's my thing about like, nice guys are guys who let you know that they're really nice guys.

Like I'm one of the good ones. Like if you have to say it, you might not be. No. Well, you know what, that reminded me of a pet peeve. I don't even know if it's tied in together or not, but when someone's like trying to fuck one of my friends or something, or flirt with them. Mm-hmm. But then I'm being ignored.

I'm like, she's not gonna, like, you have to include everyone that's sitting, sir. I'm on the board of directors. Yeah. Or just like what, or just human behavior. True. But also like, I don't know who, who you I, my friends you've been texting with for the last week, but it's not her. It's me. Yeah. Yeah. That's true too.

But no, I'm talking like just out in the wild, not even Oh, like night out, whatever guys sees one of your friends. Yes. Yes. It's like you we're talking actually, you have to include yourself in what's happening here. Our conversation. Yes. What do you do when that happens? I think when I was younger I hung out with people that like, like really craved that type of attention.

And then I would just feel really shitty about myself and sit quietly, um, or like remove myself. That's so crazy. I don't see that for you. But I think now I don't really hang out with, um, very many people that would tolerate or be in turn into that. Do you? Cause if I'm all those, those pick me girls, um, or are you not into that phrase?

I'm into the phrase I, I I think it's maybe, um, overused used. Yeah. Because me and my friend Kara, on our podcast, we, said some negative things about Taylor Swift, and then we got, like, our ratings got, oh yeah, that's demolished. I just wanna say on this podcast, I'm, I'm, I'm a Swift fan. I'm, please don't come for me.

But that's what's wild. I've seen her live, I have all her music. Like I don't hate her, but she also annoy, like, she's a person that annoys me and would annoy me, I think, if I knew her. Mm-hmm. But they were calling us, pick me girls. And it's like, oh, that's, that's misuse. That's misuse. That's so wild.

Yeah. That's not it. Uh, I just think people are, I think girls are taught from a young age that your value comes from male attention. Mm-hmm. And so if that's like, and then if you got a lot of that when you're younger and you're taught, that's like the end all be all. I understand the internal like desire or like need for that when you're out and about.

Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, I don't. I don't blame, but then you have to grow out. You have to eventually realize that, that, that that's not gonna last forever. Yeah. Or that it's not that valuable. Yeah. The currency is like, yeah, for sure. Oh my God. I know when you learn that you can give that to yourself is really a game changer.

Yeah. Like it could be fun, but to like, I now it's mostly like, when you hover and just join a thing and it's like, no, no, we're actually hanging out. Or like, I haven't seen my friend in however many months or whatever the story is. Yeah. I don't know if I have very many pick me Gs Yeah. I don't think I do either.

In life. I'm way too salty for that. No, I think most of the girls, I, it's like, um, you should be so lucky vibes. I don't know. But I do know of like friends of friends or like acquaintances that that is their goal all the time. Like they need it for their support. It's just like, try and go out and like I have a guy hit on them.

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I definitely know that It's just, um, I don't know. They must have had a hard time during the coves, no pe people who dated continue to date and people who didn't isolated. I feel like I isolated and didn't really do anything. And then people that love dating were dating. Wow.

That's this idea that people stopped doing it is they were FaceTiming, they were meeting in parks pe People that love to date were dating. Whoa. Yeah. I was not. You were shut down. Well, I had a boyfriend at the beginning of it and then we broke up during Covid. Okay. In the middle of Covid. And so then I like went through a covid breakup, which was, you know, not the best, but also not the worst.

How long were you together? Uh, two years. Okay. Two and something. But we, we moved in after the second date. Why? That's a great question. I don't know cuz we just didn't wanna be apart and so he just like moved in with me. And then Was he poor? Did he have his own place? He did, yeah. Okay. Wow. But in the time that we were together, I think he was at his place maybe five times from the second date on.

Damn. And part of that was like he, during Covid, like would go do something and then he was exposed. So I was like, you have to quarantine. You know, like, so it was really we. Yeah. So he kept his apart. I can't believe. But you were into it too. You're like, yeah, of course. Move in. Yeah, it's weird. I'm crazy in certain ways.

I am in that way too. I feel like I am obsessed and it's like immediate relationship or I don't really, like, I'm not interested one or the other. Yeah. And then it always eventually blows up in my face. Okay. Are you still dating women or men? Or both? Or Both, but I've just gone on a few days, like I'm not really dating or seeing anyone and it's kind of been like, A, like a celibate moment.

Like, it's just been kind of depressing, I would say. Okay. So we don't, we're not loving it. Oh no, I'm not loving it. I wish I was out there, but I, I don't know. Like I went on a date with this girl, it was fine. It's just like, I'm looking for something really serious, I think. Mm-hmm. Like, I wanna be like in love locked down.

And so if it's not clicking, like I'm just out. Mm. But I do follow this one dating coach, and she said, if it's not a hell no. Like if it's not an absolute no, you should continue going on dates with a person. Mm. And I wish I had done that in certain situations. Like I had a really great date with this dude that lasted hours.

And then I was just like, I don't know. I don't, I'm not really into it. I don't really wanna, like, there was no like sexual chemistry. I was like, oh, I wanna fuck. So I was like, not into it. Wait, I'm in that right now. Yeah. But so should I keep, keep going out with him? I should have just gone on a second date, but instead I have a go-to, I just pretend that I'm having a mentally unwell moment.

That's what I do. I'm just really busy. No, I go like, I'm sorry. I'm, I'm, I'm struggling mentally. I really can't do this. I just kind of do that. Cause busy's a lie. I think everyone knows busy is a lie. I know, but I feel like, hi, I'm lying to you. Just take it. No, but I follow this dating coach and to the girl I wrote, Uhhuh, you're obviously so hot and cool.

I'm just looking for something serious. I don't see this and I don't really have time for like a casual thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I felt really proud of my paragraphs. That's, that's awesome. Yeah. That's really great. I love that. I felt cool. Yeah. This, it's called a little nudge. Yeah, I follow her too, you know?

Okay. You do follow her. I think she's so good. I, I like that she makes everything simple where people are like, I don't know, he said this, but I think that, but I don't know. And she's like, just ask him. Yeah. So I think like for me, for me, I've been operating like a lot of her stuff feels very like Yeah, of course.

To me, yes. So like I kind of scroll past a lot of it, I think because I'm like, yeah, that's exactly how I would handle it. Yeah. No, I, I've learned a lot. It's been really helpful in terms of like, except I keep lying that I have like mental problems. I might, but this one dude, and then I like, ran into him and I was just like, maybe I should have gone on another date, you know?

Yeah. Like, why didn't I just, cause like right away I wasn't like so into it, but I do people bring up, have the same thing as you, where I just want to like, yeah. Immediate. I wanna be like, oh, I wanna marry this person. I'm, I'm trying, trying to run away from That's because that, that also feels like that's Yeah.

That's projection and like, it's not real, maybe not real. Correct. Do people, because of like your standup, bring up sex really early? I don't know. I don't think so. Mm. I'm noticing that now people wanna talk to me about sex, like, guys wanna talk to me about sex and like after shows. Yeah. Like, yeah. After shows.

My favorite is, one time this dude came up to me and was like, just so you know, I make my girlfriend squirt all the time. And I was like, great. You were like, do you want a cookie? Yeah, no. People do try to like, after shows, I guess. Fuck or DA or something. And I just, it real, I don't know. Yeah. It's not for me.

It's a turn off for me. Like, I had a guy last night, he, he called me and he was like asking me like, about when I masturbate, which is not a question I, I like, it doesn't, that's like, I'm fine with that, but if you're trying to like, date me, I don't know why you're asking me that so early on. Yeah. It's weird, right?

I don't, yeah. I wonder if, do people plan it out? I don't like do you have a schedule? Well, no, and that's what I was kind of saying. He was like, do you masturbate before you go to sleep? And I was like, sometimes, like, sometimes yeah, sure. But like other times, no. and is it the person that you mentioned that flew in or No.

Do I share that? I guess so. I was saying that last night, I was watching You're on, um, a collection of standups on Netflix called the Degenerates. And you have an incredibly funny set and it covers the orgasm gap, the discrepancy between male and female pleasure.

And as you're talking about how women are not coming, I was having an orgasm and also laughing, and it was the weirdest experience of my life. I'm obsessed. I love being part of your sex life. And then I was like, am I gonna have to tell her about this? And he was like, yeah, you're gonna have to tell her about this.

And I was like, was that your way of trying to get on the podcast? And he was like, no. But is he the one that asked about masturbating or No? No, no. Separate. Separate. Separate. Okay. Like the guy that asked about the masturbating is the guy that like went on a date with, was a setup. Okay. Yeah. And are you into, is it blind dates or do you serve It was a blind date.

I'm not particularly into blind dates, no, but I'm at a place now where I just can't do the apps. Like the level of crazy that is in LA right now feels like we need to institutionalize everyone. Like it's wild. What's the vibe? The vibe is, I'll give you an example. I went out with this guy and he said, my ex is crazy.

And I was like, red flag, what did you do to her? And then I found out, no, his ex was literally crazy. She found out we were dating, and ended up in the er. What, but that, that's not his, you know, but he entertained that for a really long time. Another version of crazy is like, oh, I get what you're saying.

Yeah. I mean, I feel like I'm, I'm going out with people and they're like, I'm, um, in slaw or I'm, you know, just things where I'm like, well then why are we dating? In what? Sex and Love Anonymous. Oh, wild. Yeah. So what does that mean? It means they're either a love addict or a sex addict. Uh, but they're still dating.

Yeah. Which feels maybe cause you have to get sober. Like what's, how does that, do you know about it? I don't know. I mean, I know about it because I've dated people that are in it, but no, I don't know about it firsthand. That's so wild. I wonder if pick me, girls should go to love and sex addict. I wonder if it's the same, the same situation or not same.

Yeah. Yeah. you talk about being addicted to porn, is that a real addiction? I don't think I'm addicted to it, but it, like it, you know, on Chrome it has your main sites. Mm-hmm. Like it's definitely in the main six main sites. Okay. It's like Wordle kink, PornHub. Vulture, you know? Okay. Wow. That's like maybe a Buzzfeed, YouTube, maybe a Buzzfeed at YouTube.

Like that's the main thing. But I honestly, like, I, I don't know what's going on with me. Like, I don't want anything, like, I can't even master for, like, I'm just not feeling anything in that. Oh. I went through a phase like that. I've talked about it a lot. It's pretty depressing. But also I'm having all these like skin issues and allergic reactions, and it's just not helping me in any way.

Yeah. It's taking off of my life. Maybe it's like a hormonal thing. I've been going to doctors and allergists and I have all these aller, but it's just like, it's been attacking my body in such an extreme way, and I've like eliminated all of these products and ingredients for my life. Mm-hmm. But if I, I'm on the road, so like the detergent on the sheets of hotels in are making me break out.

Whoa. And so I, I wear clothes now and then I, I was at my friend's house and again, I just like inflamed all over my body and it's so, it's like been, I don't know how to get rid of it. And it's been a struggle. Yeah, I had a doctor on here who was talking about when you have something like that, like think about when you have the flu, like you don't wanna fuck when you have the flu.

At least I don't. I think most people no. Right? And she's like, yeah, because your body's like trying to fight, everything's going to fight this thing. So it makes sense that your sex driver is like gone because your body's trying to fight off whatever thing that you're dealing with. So that's what's happening.

Once you fix that, it'll be the unlock. I hope so. Cuz I'm just not feeling anything. I don't even have a crush. There's like nothing. Mm. That's hard. There's, I don't really have a crush right now. There at texting. There's just like, I would like a crush. Nothing. Yeah, it's, it's sad. It's, we're failing, I guess.

No, that's why when you texted you're like, it's a dating and love podcast and sex. You're perfect. This is gonna be perfect. I'm like, I don't know about that. You're like, my life is truly passing the Bechtel test right now. Yeah. I, I'm just like watching TV all day and then going to sets and trying to like quit smoking weed.

It's like an in between period of my life. Well, okay. I did get a question for you about like, how do you get over a bad breakup? And I know that you've talked about one, the, like one from forever ago Therapy. I think therapy, but I actually got to have like, um, a really special moment. So I got dumped, I was blindsided and then I kept learning stuff cuz they were a compulsive liar.

So then things kept coming up and like through conversations with Mutuals and I would say something and they'd be like, oh wait, but that night that was happening and I was like, what the fuck? So it was like months and months of. Learning more lies, deception, twisted shit. And then, wow. So that was really hard where I was like, who did I even date?

Who did I even date? Why was I so, and I knew it going in, why did I go so fast? Like I. All of the things. And then they continued to play games and email and still wanting to be nice. And then That's so insane. Yeah. So it just took me a while because I was really attracted to them. I was so into them. And then I was being just like manipulated in this way.

So I was depressed for a while, watched a bunch of survivor and then got into therapy. Thank God. Like I vibed with my therapist so much. We had a great four years together and she helped me. But then what was amazing, so I flew to London for other stuff. And then I have mutual friends with my ex. So I go to this big birthday party.

Mm-hmm. And I see one of her good friends with a, like a cute chick. I assume they're dating. I live my life at this birthday party, having fun. This girl comes out to me and goes, listen, we need to clear the elephant in the room. And I go, oh, what? And she was this person's ex as well, but more recent. And she was having a full mental breakdown.

Like I was like truly falling apart, didn't know what to do. Her friends are like, and so I was already two years deep into therapy. And so I got to stare at like myself two years ago and actually see like progress, like in myself. And I think that's so rare to see like, um, a psycho version of you mirrored back.

And so I talked to this girl and I was like, you should just go to therapy. And she's a psychopath and like that it is what it is. It is what it is. Um, but they were also dating in a chunk of time where this person was still texting me and like I had seen them in the summer, that summer and like talked, not a word, not a word, that they were in another relationship.

And so it's like shady people really are shady. Yes. And what's uh, they keep it consistent. They keep it consistent. And what's wild is, wait, what did I wanna say? Um, whatever. But they're so famous now, and now they live here and it's like, I haven't run into them, but Oh, I see the billboards.

Netflix will suggest, oh my God, now I know who it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my God. But that's why I was with someone yesterday and they started talking shit about this person. Like, I think eventually it comes out when you like fuck over enough, uh, people and stuff like that.

Yes, it does. And the internet is powerful and Yeah. But they are very charming and they're like sexy and so, and talented. So eventually like that's very alluring. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And And I think she likes to turn straight girls out. That's the thing. That's, that is what, um, this person is known for.

Yeah. Yes. Wow. A hundred percent. Okay. So, and that's like the girl that I was looking at at this party, she was like straight forever. And then, um, was just like devastated. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. In this, um, situation. And then I've run into their friends and stuff who have been like, yeah, they're crazy. I don't know what you expected.

Like even their friends are like, yeah, maniac. Wow, okay. Interesting. Yeah. But, um, so therapy was the unlock, the, the therapy was unlocked because how long you wait. A lot of stuff I like, I truly, we like hung out one time and I was like, oh, that's my wife. I was like, I'm gonna marry this person.

That's my person. And so that's not fair to the person either. Cause like I'm creating a narrative and that that doesn't exist. That does not exist. Yeah. Instead of slowly getting to know someone, but also I was like, we should be open. Hmm. Like, we live far apart. you're kind of slutty. And I, and they were like, absolutely not.

Absolutely not. I don't wanna do that. Like, I'm all about you. But then they were like fucking someone that I had fucked. It was crazy. So obviously that person came back and told you, um, no, it was like, I'm mutual. Cuz I was like, oh, I know this Scottish person. And she was like, oh yeah, that guy. Like blah, blah, blah.

And then told a wild story and I was like, wait, wait, wait, what? And I was like, and then I found out that they were like hooking up at the same time that this person was messaging me, being like, I miss you so much, I can't wait to see you. I wish you were here at this party. Less than that. So your superpower is also you find out the truth while getting like, uh, you know, fingered in the bathroom while like sending me photos from that party, shit like that when I was like, we you should, we should be open.

Yeah. You know, cuz I was like deep in love and if you're not, you need to say something. Say something. Yeah. Because I gave all the option, like if, if I was coming onto intense, which I was. There's a way to end it or be like, oh, that's not really what I do. Or I like to do this. you know, I think the joy of it is the deception.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Some people, that's like a kink. I think for some people it's like that it's nty and they ed to my love, like they should probably be in that little group you're talking about. Because sloth, I'm like a very loving person and like I think they liked that. I think they liked how obsessed I was.

Of course. Who wouldn't? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'm like a great gift giver. Like I love fun trips, like and long distance. It's like the whole relationship with fun, the whole thing is that. Fun trips. Yeah. And so I, you know, I was like thinking I'm in this romantic fairytale, was that the first woman you ever dated?

Dated, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, cool. I mean, not cool, but like, What a journey. What a journey, what a what a wild journey. So are you on the apps? I mean, not now, but were you on the apps? Or how would you like meet people? I don't think people like, like me in that way. Like, I think I need to know, like, I don't get the, I don't get what I want from the apps, so it's kind of hard.

Or maybe I'm not putting in what I want. Mm. But I don't really get the attention from who I want on the apps, so it's not like fun for me. Oh, that sucks. Yeah. But once, I guess I wasn't either, I usually do the apps like to fuck on vacation. Like if I'm in New Orleans, I'll get on an app and just like see what's up.

But like New Orleans has the tallest dudes. Really the tallest dudes I got on the app. My sister lives in New Orleans. I got on the apps and I started screen grabbing them because every other dude was six three to six five. And I was like, what the f Or are they lying? Oh, so New Orleans either has the tallest dudes or the most liars per capita.

Yeah. Trixie and Katya. Do you listen to their podcasts? No, I should. I'm obsessed. Um, but they're, they were just talking about like, lying on the apps is so fucked. Like, we're gonna see your short, you're gonna see your dick is different. Like yeah, you're gonna see you look different, use your photos. Don't you wanna be with someone that is attracted to what you look like right now?

I don't know why people do that. I, that was like the same thing with the catfish that I went on. I just never wanna disappoint anybody. And he was like 10 years older. And I've gained a bunch of weight in this past year, and it's like I updated my phone.

Amazing. But I updated my photos immediately. Sure. Like I would never want, and I don't ever wanna show up in a situation and someone is like not happy that I'm here. Disappointed. Yeah. I want you to see the photos of exactly what I look like. I'll be honest, I kind of like underplay on the app so that if I ever show up, they're like, damn, that's fun.

And I'm like, yeah, that's right. I'm fucking hotter. That's so exciting. Mm-hmm. But I had one person show up to my house that looked so different, and then they were like nagging me in a way when I was like, um, you have to leave. Ew. That's like very early thoughts. Legit. I opened the door Uhhuh and she went, that's what you decided to wear first thing out of, did you close the door?

No, I was like, okay. You know, I just thought I was looking cute. Like fun. But yeah, no, I gave it another like 10, 15 minutes and then I was like, oh, this is not gonna work. So, and because it was a girl, the rejection was easier and she was just like, oh, okay. I, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. Do you still wanna like go to dinner or something?

And I was like, no, no, not really. Yeah, I bet that's cooler with women because like the, there's like such a risk, like I feel like I'm always walking a tightrope with men and their egos so that I don't get retaliated against. Yes. You know, like that's real. I got egg and tricked like on a date last year and then it, I was like, okay, well bye.

And he's like, wait, did I just fuck this up? And I was like, yes, yes. You can't like N me play a trick, like try to fuck with my fucking confidence. Like now I'm outta here. Like the whole world is dogging on women. I do not need it for my date. No. And we met in my hotel room bar, so to me it's like I was kind of a shirt thing hot skipping a jump.

Like what is the reason to not be on your best behavior? Yeah. I think it's because there's so many men with podcasts talking about like how to get women. Okay. On TikTok. I think it's that I know I'm really scared my nephew is gonna be a bad. Boy, so like a red pill. I, he's into weightlifting right now, protein powder.

He is a bad sign. He's bad sign. Bulking. He, and then he's telling me the comics that show up in his explore page and Oh no, you know, I think he's trolling me at times and he is so nice to his grandparents and so all of us. So like he's, he does have a heart, but I am scared that he is going to just be my father and just be alu for decades or something.

Your father was alu for decades? Yeah, he didn't marry my mom till he was 50 and I was born like a week after they got married. Oh wow. Okay. So he really held out. Yeah, and they, I have a sister that's 10 years older too, and he was kind of, he wouldn't live with my mom or the child. Oh shit. Yeah, this is in the Soviet Union.

He was just like a fucking slut and a mama's boy and just like a man child. How do you think that's affected your, like view on love and relationships? Well, I don't, I'm very anti chauvinist. I'm like, traditional gender roles are really fucked. And so a lot of my like disgust with the patriarchy or like just men in society comes from inside my home.

Oh wow. Okay. Cool, cool. For sure. But to me, so my sister is really funny. She's like, I want, I would never date a Russian man. I would never be like our father. I always said I would never date someone She's married to one. No. She's like, I got married and I realized I'm our father. And so she's kind of like this jerk.

No, she's actually incredible. But she married an angel of a man. I always say he is the only good man I know. Like truly a, an angel, the most thoughtful human being that I've ever met. Do you believe in marriage? Yeah, I wanna be married. Okay, so not traditional gender roles, but you do wanna be married?

Yeah, I would love to be married. I'm like, I, like I said, I'm very romantic, like I'm a hopeless romantic. And I just think the idea of like, Wedding marriage commitment is romantic. Yeah. So I'm into it. And obviously, there's roughness, like it's not all like. We're romantic, but um, yeah, I love that idea.

Yeah. You pretty partnership. I love the idea of partnership. Yeah, me too. But, my mom cooks, cleans, does everything, makes my dad, it's like whatever he says goes, like, there was just this one moment, like, he won't even put the dish in the sink, you know, it's like he's thoughtful in other ways.

He's like a man born in the thirties, so I don't really expect much else from him. But like then he, he went into the living room and like turned on a show that they were watching together while she did the dishes. And it's like, not only did you not help her do the dishes after she cooks, now you're like cheating on her with the favorite TV show.

Like you are, you're so not thoughtful. You're not even waiting to watch this thing with her. Thoughtfulness is like the thing that I absolutely like cannot fuck with because I watched my, my dad is like the most thoughtful person on the planet. I've told this story before. But, he re-proposed to my mom on their wedding anniversary. Flew the family, her whole family out, got down on one knee and repose with a ring twice the size and asked for another 25 years of marriage. Didn't tell anyone was a huge surprise. My dad's the man that like comes in with flowers and my mom's like, wait, what is this for?

And he's like, because I love you. That's so nice. And I just grew up with that, so I'm like kind of fucked cuz thoughtfulness is huge to me. Yeah, yeah. I see some of my friends marriages, relationships with these people and it's like, did you watch Vanderpump Walls A little bit. So there was like a marriage that just, um, had a divorce, you know, recently Yeah.

With Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney. Yeah. And it's like she turned out to be the one that knew she knew, but there's like a scene of her kind of crying in her confessional and she's like, I just have to choose myself. Like I'm done waiting for someone to come out. Wait, like waiting for someone to be more like waiting for someone to take my side and like be that person for me.

And I feel like I had that moment last year and that's why I'm at the way that I'm at. It was just like one fuck boy. Too many broke the proverbial, I don't know. What would that be? I don't know the back, but like, it's like, I guess my back, like, I just like, it is like one fuck boy. Too many.

And I was like, I'm done. And now it's like I just have to choose me. Yeah. I ju yeah, I, cause I'm also nervous cause I am very thoughtful, but like, I have bad, like, I don't know how to cook. I don't cl, I don't do things that someone else would probably want in a human. Really. Like what do you do? I'm just like a, I'm really messy.

Oh, okay. I'm really messy all and that makes me nervous. But I think we could hire someone. Yeah. I feel like Yeah. Yeah. I've also like had really bad communication things, so I've like really been working on like being more direct and upfront and like all that. That's wild. I would never picture that because I just feel like you are such a confident, big personality.

Yeah. To ever, but like when it's issues, like I, like a lot of my friendships have, and it caused issues where like, I will do what the other person wants and my first relationship was like this, and then I resent them for not doing what I want. Like codependent stuff. Mm-hmm. And like, I don't wanna bring this up, I'll just keep it in.

And then it likes, it snowballs, and then it's huge. Then ni pick everything they do. So what's, how are you trying to stop that? bringing stuff up in the moment. Okay. Or like day up, like right away or the next day, and this is not even romantic, but like in professional and like friendship and everything, like Yeah.

I'm so used to talking shit or complaining or stewing and so like I really focus on bringing stuff up in the moment. Yeah, that's as it happens. So then it, first it's so scary at first, not a deal. And then it's, then once you do it a few times, I feel like it gets not a big deal. And then you're like, oh, I can totally do this.

This is what, like asserting healthy boundaries is. Yeah. It just sucks because sometimes people react wild and then you have to be like, no, you don't act, you can't like yell. Yeah. I'm not gonna be yelled at for like, at all. Saying a thing. Yeah. Matter of fact, with no, like other Right. Salinas around it. I have one question and then, the rapid fire questions.

I love rapid fire. I love a game. Yeah. I've also been so sincere, like, fuck, I am a comedian, but I know you are a comedian. The question was from a guy and he said if.

You were hooking up with a dude and they either like, they had like some sort of like sexual dysfunction or the dick was like, did not, it was like unimpressive. Would, would you give them another second date or no? Yeah, that's actually one of my biggest pet peeves in sex scenes and movies mm-hmm. Is like, when a dick doesn't work, it's like done.

And I just feel like there's so much more hooking up that can be done even if your dick's not working. And so that's what's confusing to me. And maybe that's cuz like, I'll fuck girls too, but like, there's just other things to do and then your dick can be touched in the morning. Yeah. Like hopefully your dick will be hard the next day.

Yeah. But like, I like getting, like, I like getting fingered. I don't know. Like same, same. Yeah. I like making out, like there's just like other things to be done. It's so weird I know. And that I, I, and I think that's all in the movies and it's guys insecurities and their perspective because men are writing the movies. Right. So to them it's like, oh, the duck's not working. And then that's the end of everything. It's just, that's such a man perspective.

So heteronormative, I don't know, there's like a drawer of stuff. Like I, I don't Ooh, what's your go-to toy Hitachi? Mine too. Yeah, the wand. Oh yeah, that's, that's a, okay. That's how it came up last night. I use mine though, but I have a controller cuz it's like a, it'll like blow my clit off if I just use it as is.

What do you mean a controller? it's like a little box and it has a speed dial on it so I can speed it up or slow it down. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. But mine has buttons on it. Mine is, Attached to that? To the, yeah. Oh yeah. Mine's not the Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mine's like, oh, I should just get a new one.

I bought a mini one so I could travel. Oh, nice. But I also, I love microphone when I'm in a nice hotel and I love getting in the bathtub With a wand? No, with the faucet. Oh, oh. It's like, that seems, that's dangerous. That's my favorite. But I wouldn't do it in my apartment or at a shitty hotel. It has to be a nice hotel.

Yeah, sure. But now the showers are so popular. Yes. Because of the shower heads of like, really they're on X mode. Yeah. That, that is, yeah, that is true. I like what, there's a wand. but most, I'm just not even feeling hor. That's what I mean. Like I have a whole drawer of stuff and it's like nothing. I don't know.

I think it's cool to normalize not being horny as a, as a professionally horny person. Um, like I would consider you professionally horny. I think I was. And then you Yeah. You had too many fuck boys. I had too many disappointment and now I'm like, done. And now my skin's attacking me. Yeah. So, but like that happens, like we, I don't know.

You gotta, you kind of gotta talk about it and own it and be like, this is like reality. Sure. I mean, back to scandal ball, that was the big thing. He just kept being like, we didn't fuck enough. We didn't fuck enough. And she's like, I want emotional intimacy. Like, I'm not your fleshlight. Yeah. Like, what do you mean?

There's like more to intimacy than just like, I also had that too, like where my boyfriend, that's so then anytime he would touch me, whether it was like he came up and touch small my back, I was like, fuck, he's gonna try and fuck me. And it made like I, my anxiety around sex grew so big. Like anytime he was doing something nice, I knew it was just because he wanted to fuck me and.

The unlock for him. Had he known, it was like if he had started doing things where we would just make out, then he would stop. Or if he just was like sweet and physical or intimate, but then stopped, I think we would've had way more sex. But anything he did felt like it was like him saying, oh, I would like to have sex with you now, because he was not nice outside of that.

No, he was nice outside of it, but it was just I think if you start to realize that anytime he's being like intimate or physically intimate, it's because he wants sex. Yeah. Then there becomes this expectation. Well it's, and there's like an anxiety around it. It's full circle from where we started the convo.

It's the nice guy thing. Like you're doing it for a thing, not just to do it. And that is not nice. That is not nice. That's actually manipulative. It's manipulative. And maybe you're trying to be polite, but Right. It's not nice. It's not nice at all. Yeah. Should we rapid fire it? Yeah, I would love to. Rapid fire.

Okay. killer move. What's your go-to killer Move in in bed? Sure. I don't even know. I have no idea. What's a killer move like on a date? I'm humiliated. I don't know if it's a killer move. I like to, I like to start hooking up. Like in an elevator or like on the way or like in the stairs or an unexpected place.

The car or when we're about to Yeah, like I like, um, I really like before you even get to a place. Okay. Like the make out, um, horniness at, at drinks or like on the way. Nice. Nice. I think I like that. Do you like ever send the text? It's like, I wanna fuck you. Of course. I actually love sending, I'm always scared that.

My life will be ruined. I love videos and photos Oh, so much. And texts. I do not. Yeah, I really do. And, um, my tattoos are in it always. Like, it's just the, the, the world has my stuff. Um, or on the way to, I also like, like a vestibule, like grabbing someone and going into like, into a business when it's like, oh, I think bathroom.

Like if you're at a bar and you're like, maybe in the bathroom it's very hot. Yeah, I like that. I guess that that would be my killer. Yeah. Okay. Killer date. What's your dream date? Hmm. That's exciting. Um, honestly like an outdoor, like a pat patio with a view with fun drinks. Love that. Yeah. Yeah.

That's great. Beach view, city view, rooftop vibe, drinks, chat. Hangouts. Like, I wanna do that now. Yeah. And then maybe, um, like a, a stroll with a joint after fun. Yeah. I think that would date killer. Cheapness rudeness. Yeah. Stuff like that. Like non generous or rigid? Rigid. yeah. Yeah. But the, that's not specific, but like, yeah.

what's your weapon of choice? Silent treatment and being like, nothing, but we talked about it. My communication is better.

Yeah. But just being like, just fully shutting down. Everyone knows something's changed, but I refuse to bring it up. Mm mm mm I think that would be, yeah, the main thing. What's one thing in your self-love practice? saying nice stuff to myself out loud, like while I'm driving. Really? Can you gimme an example?

No, I'm so humiliated. I'd rather keep talking about killer sex moves. Well, one of my, no, I think that that's so awesome and I try to encourage people to do that too, because I really think that we, so my mom told me this thing once that she saw a therapist and they gave her a clicker and they said, hit the clicker every time you have a negative thought about yourself.

And it was like a hundred and something and it was in a day. And then the therapist was like, yeah, you need to do that except with nice things because you need to rewire your neural pathways to love yourself because you're just negging yourself all day long. And it's, it's, it is really hard and it's also hard when you're trying to be positive, but then the outside world is, Telling you a different thing.

Sure, sure. Constantly. But yeah, when I'm in bed and I don't wanna get up, I'm always just like, your life is incredible. You're doing everything that you've ever wanted to do. You know, like all that stuff. Like your friends, like you, your family, fucking amazing, your parents are alive, you know, shit like that.

Yeah. Um, like I have everything but my killer move. I don't know if this is a killer move, but I have been thinking, but I, I mean, I think I say this in my comedy a lot, but I like to get calm down a lot. Oh, that's your killer move. That'll be my vulnerable moment, I guess. Okay. Okay. Dope. Yeah. So I feel that's like fun.

I like to see it. Okay. And I feel like people enjoy that. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's rare. Yeah. You're like, fire hose me, let's go. Yeah. But yeah, I think just nice things and counting every little win. Yeah. It's important. Like, even if you've done two positive things in a day instead of all day, you fucked up.

You know? It's like the po the positive. Yeah. Focus on the positive. Yeah. This is my last and final question, and I ask everybody it, what is it, what's the best dating advice or love advice you've ever received?

I don't, I've, I've been doing a bit about this. I don't know if it's fully serious, but do you really like this quote that's make a list of everything you want in a partner and then become that list? Mm. So I believe that. I totally believe that. Yeah. Like wanting so much from a different person, but it's like, Are you doing these things?

Yeah. What are you bringing to the table? And also if you can give it to yourself, then you don't need to go get it in somebody else. Yeah. Or like, I think that therapists do this where it's like, write what you want and then they do it. And then be like, okay, how many of those things are you doing? Did you watch Indian matchmaking?

Yes. So, you know the guy who kept being like, I need a fit girl, I need a fit girl. And then he lo he was like, I do CrossFit. It's like, no, you don't. Yeah. Like, you are not in shape. What you talking about is fine. Yeah. But like, let's stop lying about it. You cannot be demanding it of it. And then he like bonded with that cute, fun girl didn't care.

And then he went on, on a date with like, I don't know, like an Instagram model vibe. She was not into him at all. No. She gave him nothing. Well, and it's, and he's like, oh, we were so connected. It was just such a window to the male brain in, in a way that I have never seen so clearly where it's like you truly were giggling, laughing, like having fun with this girl.

It was getting along with your siblings everything. And it's, and it was cute. Think you're supposed to be with that. Who, who was not interested in that at all. Giving you crickets. Yes. And him being like, shocked. I think I should go for that. I think I should go for that, because like that's where my future's at.

And he was shocked she wasn't into him. I know. Which is so weird. It was, I love Indian matchmaking and Jewish matchmaking. I much, me too. That show is amazing. I love them both. Yes. Or he sucked though, and I hate that he got who he wanted. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because when he got that amazing girl, I was like, she's too good for you.

Yeah. A hundred, a hundred. But I just, I love the woman. I love the, I can't remember her name right now, but I love the host. I, it was more spiritual and less like cultural than the Indian. It was more like the Indian matchmaking. SEMA is very much like you get 60%. Stop it. Yeah. You've been too picked. No, no, no.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And for Jewish matchmaking, it did seem like she was just like, I will find you what you need. Yeah. It's about growing. I don't know. There was just a little more, I love that you're gonna get what you want. Vibe from her, which I think is true. I think everybody can get what they want. I do believe that.

Yeah, I truly do. Yeah. Damn. I'm trying to think of other good advice. No, that you nailed it. Yeah, that's the thing. Lisa, if people want more of you, how did they find you? I'm at glitter cheese on Instagram and then the link tree there has like all my tour dates. I'm on the road in August, a podcast called, that's messed up, an SVU podcast.

Mm-hmm. And we, I'll link to all of it. Cool. Yeah. And then July 13th, premiere of Survival of the Thickest Michelle Beau's Netflix show, which is gonna be amazing. And I'm in it and I can't wait. Thank you so much. I, I guess I'll save this. Thank you. Hope it was fine. I feel like I was, I, no, I also feel like such a disappointment on pods instead of why, because I'm just too sincere in, in the moment and not being funny.

And I feel bad about it. People can go watch your comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I will say this. You are my favorite comedian. Thank you. And I told Baron, I told Morgan that everybody knows that, so this was like big for me. Thank you. Well, and shout out to you. I'm so bad at, communicating and scheduling on stuff.

And you really pushed it and made it happen. I did. Cause I was like, I'm so happy I am meeting this bitch. I love her. You got me out of the house into West Hollywood Gorgeous day. It was so beautiful to drive. But you did it. Yes. You made it happen. Thank, and I appreciate that so much. Thank you.